Gotta love bureaucracy!

I received a rather threatening letter in the mail the other day from the Commonwealth of Conservative Morons DMV. I tried to notify them that I had left the state right after I moved, but for some odd reason they didn’t seem to care. Apparently 5 months on it is time to send a letter out threatening to take away my driving privileges and my ability to register motor vehicles.

Why do governments in the south make it so difficult to do the right thing? Is there a need to threaten people or something? Can’t they put 2+2 together? They managed to address the letter to my current address OUT OF STATE. You’d think they could figure out that I didn’t live there anymore. I only responded because they threatened to suspend my driving privileges in the Commonwealth of Conservative Morons, and I drive across the state about once every 6-weeks.

My response to them follows:

February 22, 2006 

Commonwealth of Conservative Morons
Department of Motor Vehicles
PO Box 27412
Hooterville, COCM 2xxxx-0001

Dear Sir or Madam: I am writing in response to a letter dated February 14, 2006 that managed to track me down at my new residence in Conservative Hell, where I have obtained all the proper documentation to register and drive a motor vehicle. It never ceases to amaze me how bureaucratic things can be when it comes to registration and operation of motor vehicles especially if a person commits the egregious sin of moving elsewhere. Frustration aside please take into consideration the attached documentation that demonstrates why the Commonwealth of Conservative Morons has no jurisdiction over either myself or my motor vehicle(s):

1. Regarding the insurance issue, please take note of the attached copy of my insurance identification card with Insurance Company, policy #xxx-xxxx-xxxxxx. The effective dates of this policy are October 1, 2005 through October 1, 2006. This policy was in effect on February 13, 2006, which is the date identified in your correspondence.

2. The 2002 car, VIN #XXXXXXXXXXXXXX (COCM tag #XXXXXX) is now registered in the state of Conservative Hell. The registration was assigned in late November 2005 and is valid through December 15, 2006. A copy of the registration for this vehicle is included on the same sheet as the insurance ID card for Insurance Company.

3. The 2004 car, VIN #XXXXXXXXXXXXXX (COCM tag #XXXXXXX) was sold by me to XXXXX on December 5, 2005 as shown by the attached vehicle purchase agreement. Since I no longer own this vehicle, I am no longer responsible for the legal documentation to support it.

Since I no longer reside in the Commonwealth of Conservative Morons and have obtained the proper documentation for both my driving privileges and motor vehicles in my current state of residence, I request that personal information be corrected and handled appropriately in your system.

Please call me at (123) 456-7890 from 9:00 AM through 4:30 PM M-F to verify that this has been completed and that I have no further business with your department at this time.

Sincerely,

CQ

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3 Responses to “Gotta love bureaucracy!”

  1. Unbelievable. OK, I want you to write my complaint letters from now on!

  2. Cynical Queer Says:

    I keep talking about the motor vehicle thugs around here, but then I remember it has been nearly a decade since I lived in the west. Perhaps things have gotten as burdensome out there.
    I think what I found rather frustrating is that they have my out of state address on the letter. You would think they could figure things out from that. *shrugs*

  3. […] Today I received a letter from the Secretary of Veterans Affairs which was forwarded to me and the 26.5 million others by the IRS of all places and it’s dated MAY 2006, um.. lesse… It’s the middle of June, I’m so glad I was notified a month and a half ago when it happened. I’m guessing it was forwarded by the IRS as the department of Veterans Affairs is very good at losing your information but not knowing your actual address. Much like the Department of Motor Vehicles in the Commonwealth of Conservative Morons, the IRS is very good at knowing your current address, but doing nothing to help you with your questions. […]

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